I’m getting “up there” in the chronological age listing. Naww, let’s face it, I’m “up there!” Some of my friends are up here too – or are close by ,and they’re anxious. They’re anticipating all sorts of unpleasant things that are ahead, especially in matters of health, finances and overall well-being – from wrinkles to mobility/hearing/vision/dental/limb issues/loss of friends and more. I hear them say things like “I’m almost 70 or 75 or 80 or …” As if a particular age were a hurdle to “get over.”
The additional matter of the world feeling uncertain, (economically, politically, socially (feeling ‘heavy’ as some of my friends put it), it’s true. Responsibilities multiply. Losses accumulate. Personal disappointments surface. Business setbacks become reality. Family tensions, spiritual doubts can arise. Yet I’ve come to believe that aging gives something powerful: CONTEXT. As seniors, we recognize patterns; we remember other storms that passed. Context.
Aging has much to give. It can
… teach self-acceptance: the urgency to prove oneself can soften into the focus on living truthfully
… provide steadiness in decisions: shaped less by impulse and more by long-view judgment
… expand a sense of compassion: as we understand that everyone is navigating their own unseen struggles
… offer opportunities for self-reflection, humility and trust: showing growth in faith / spiritual life.
To be sure, aging doesn’t remove difficulty. Instead, it can strengthen our capacity to hold difficulty without being undone by it. In so doing, we realize that strength is patient and grows.
It’s true – there are seasons when change hits us in the face, feels unwelcome and is painful: when roles evolve, health shifts, long-held plans have to be revised. But change can also invite re-invention … opportunities to consider ‘possibilities’ as we learn to be intentional about holding on to what matters, and shedding what no longer seems to matter. And that includes downsizing material possessions.
Aging is, in a nutshell, an opportunity to continue ‘becoming.’ It’s not always easy. But it is meaningful. And surely ‘meaning’ (more than youth) is what sustains a life well-lived?
My late husband was a calligrapher and penned our favourite saying … “Age is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” <Mark Twain>. Hans was a lot older than I, but that didn’t stop him (or me), from playing. It’s true, as George Bernard Shaw wrote “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” As much as I love Twain’s words, I love Eleanor Roosevelt’s words on this subject even more: “Beautiful young people are accidents of nature but beautiful old people are works of art.”
I like the thought that I’m a work of art – you’re a work of art – each of us, privileged to live into our senior years – are works of art! So I continue … facing the issues ahead, personally and politically … and believing, as CS Lewis said, “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” One of my goals is to continue writing these ‘Soulistry: Artistry of the Soul’ reflections. Not having Hans by my side anymore, there is no one close by to share such reflections, so I write – “journal” in my blog.
What goal / dream are you setting? How are you a work of art? What ways are you dealing with what life hands you, with an attitude, a spirituality of playfulness? May we all remember that “Aging is not to mourn what is lost, but to celebrate what remains.”(unknown author)
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Text: © June Maffin Aging Image: Chat GPT Mark Twain calligraphed quote: © Hans van der Werff
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