THIRD DAY OF CHRISTMAS: A VOICE TO SING!

THIRD DAY OF CHRISTMAS: A VOICE TO SING!

On this, the Third day in the Season of Christmas, let’s sing!
I wish for you, a voice!   

* A voice that would sing.

* A voice
that would be 
a voice for the voiceless in the world.


* A voice
that would let elected politicians know when they are not standing up for justice, not speaking truth, not representing their constituents but themselves in their words, actions and decisions.

* A voice that would echo the cries 
of the innocent, the tortured, the unjustly tried and imprisoned, the abused, the homeless, the hungry, the minorities, the incarcerated, the lonely, the isolated, the fearful.

* A voice that would write letters to the editor and speak out on behalf of local, national and international injustices.

* A voice that would be kind in word, thought and action.


* A voice
that would express innermost feelings to loved ones before it is too late.

* And a voice that speaks to one’s own heart with a gentle reminder of love, worth, and ‘becoming’ one’s full potential.


Be a voice

… and sing!

Happy Third Day of Christmas!

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© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
@soulistryjune.bsky.social

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As always, you are welcome to share with others and comment here.    And you are invited to subscribe to the 12 Days of Christmas series by going to the right hand top of this reflection. Subscribe to Blog via Email.  Notifications of new reflections will come directly to you via email.

May the Twelve Days of Christmas be a reminder that Christmas isn’t just “one day.”  The Spirit of Christmas can continue to be alive in hearts and lives every day – even beyond the Season of Christmas.   🙂
June Maffin

musicday3

SECOND DAY OF CHRISTMAS: Twice!

SECOND DAY OF CHRISTMAS: Twice!

On this, the Second Day in the Season of Christmas
may the “two turtle doves” as in the “12 Days of Christmas” song notes
be …

Two Times the Gift of Insight
about the true meaning of the Christmas Message.

Two Times the Gift of Patience
with others and ourselves.

Two Times the Gift of Serenity
to accept the things we cannot change.

Two Times the Gift of Courage
to change the things we can.

Two Times the Gift of Wisdom
to know the difference between things we can and cannot change.

Two Times the Gift of Love

to give and receive.

Two Times the Gift of Hope
to focus on possibilities

Happy Second Day – “Two Times” Day – of Christmas!

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May the Twelve Days of Christmas be a reminder that Christmas isn’t just “one day.”   The Spirit of Christmas can continue to be alive in hearts and lives and be lived every day – even beyond the Season of Christmas.   

As always, you are welcome to share with others and comment here.

And you are invited to subscribe to the 12 Days of Christmas series by going to the right hand top of this reflection. Subscribe to Blog via Email.  Notifications of new reflections will come directly to you via email.

 © June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
@soulistryjune.bsky.social
www.soulistry.com/groups/facebook

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

As I sat in the stillness of early Christmas morning in a quiet time of meditation, the angel on the Christmas tree, dressed in white satin and tiny pearls, softly blew on her trumpet.

“Hope” she gently trumpeted.
Hope for those who feel hopeless.  Don’t lose sight of hope.”

“Joy” she gently trumpeted.
“Joy for those who experience no joy.   Don’t lose sight of joy.”

“Peace” she gently trumpeted.
“Peace for those who don’t know what peace feels like.  Don’t lose sight of peace.”

“Love” she gently trumpeted.
Love for those who are unaware that love exists.  Don’t lose sight of love.”

But, from time to time, we lose sight of peace and joy and love and hope, as personal worries, global concerns, fear, war, financial and unresolved health issues occupy our thoughts.

Gentle Trumpeting Angel, you have sounded the call to remember that the signs of Hope, Peace, Joy, Love … *are* here.  Sometimes in big ways. Sometimes in not-so-big ways.   But, they are here.

This holiday season, may we rejoice … let the angels wrap us in their loving wings and give us signs and reminders that Hope and Joy and Peace and Love are possible for ourselves and for our world.

May the entire Season of Christmas, with its 12 days, be blessed.  Blessed with hope, peace, joy and love in ways you can’t even begin to imagine.  And may your soul be touched in some gentle, unexpected way.

Merry Christmas!   Today is the *first* of the 12 Days of Christmas!

Onwards to the remaining eleven days of the Season of Christmas.

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As always, you are welcome to share and comment here.

And you are invited to subscribe to the 12 Days of Christmas series by going to the right hand top of this reflection Subscribe to Blog via Email.  Notifications of new reflections will come directly to you via email.   
(No cost; no distribution/selling of personal info).

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© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog    and www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
@soulistryjune.bsky.social

This sweet “Trumpeting Angel” shows up on my Christmas Tree every year and was the muse for this reflection.

CHRISTMAS EVE: Let the children teach us.

CHRISTMAS EVE: Let the children teach us.

Today is Christmas Eve in this part of the world.    And for many, it’s a special time.   Or, is it?

Do you remember Archie Bunker of TV’s “All in the Family” fame?  In one Christmas Eve episode, Archie said to his wife Edith: “Stifle, Edith. Let’s have a little Silent Night around here for a change. I’m the only one thinking of the real solemn meaning of Christmas.  Christmas is supposed to be a time of peace and quiet contemplation.”

Edith replied “But Archie, I think you’re allowed to be jolly, too.”

“Sure, Edith. I never said you shouldn’t be jolly.  Just be jolly with your mouth shut” said Archie.

When I first saw that tv episode, I was not amused by Archie’s response.  When I saw that episode again, I couldn’t help but wonder, especially in light of all the misery, suffering, fear-about-the-future that is happening, how can people “stifle” Christmas?

Joy is needed.
Hope in a better tomorrow is needed.
Celebration is needed.
Especially at a time such as this.

Children are a wonderful reminder that ultimately
… good *can* conquer evil
… hope *can* overcome despair
… love *can* obliterate hatred
… joy *can* permeate sadness.

If we “stifle” the joy, the hope, the celebration …

If we “stifle”
… and don’t speak out against hatred, racism, lies, evil
… don’t speak out against what we know is wrong
… don’t let our voice and actions protest injustice and cruelty,
a legacy will be left for children that will change this world in unspeakable ways.

There could be no children who
… will be able to teach how to live with hope, goodness, love, joy
… could give hope with … their smiles and infectious eyes … their innocence … their ability to enter into joy with their imagination intact … their anticipation and sheer delight at holidays and birthdays … their wide-eyed awe at the sight of a puppy, a kitten, coloured Christmas lights … their expectant hope that Santa would visit them this night.

Let us not stifle!   Let’s let the children teach us.  Teach us how to “live Christmas” whether Christmas is observed as a religious celebration or a secular holiday.

Let us look for the good, the joy, the hope, the Santa, the elves, the Christ Child, the angels, the simple act of believing that each day is a gift and each person is a gift.

© June Maffin
As always, you are welcome to share Soulistry reflections.

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Tomorrow, Christmas Day, begins the Twelve Days of Christmas: the first day of the Season of Christmas. 

A series of reflections throughout each of the Twelve Days of Christmas begins tomorrow and will be found at https://soulistry.com/blog     www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry and bluesky (@soulistryjune.bsky.social

You are welcome to subscribe to the series at https://soulistry.com/blog. (no cost; no spam mail; no selling of personal information/email address)..

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© June Maffin
www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
https://soulistry.com/blog
@soulistryjune.bsky.social

On The Eve of Christmas Eve

On The Eve of Christmas Eve

It’s December 23rd –  the “eve of Christmas Eve”.  I’ve been hearing a concern from many who say something like … “I’ve not finished making/sending my Christmas cards  – or received cards from friends I forgot to include in my Christmas card list?   I meant to, but … the weather was miserable, I wasn’t well, work/the kids were demanding my attention, I didn’t have the energy, the postal strike upset my plans, I can’t get into the mood for Christmas this year with all of the terrible news …”

It’s the eve-of-Christmas-Eve and they’re thinking that it’s too late to mail anything before Christmas … the clock is ticking … December 25th is almost here and Christmas will be over too soon.   

No!  Christmas won’t be over on December 26th. 
Christmas isn’t just one day. 
Christmas is an entire season! 
Christmas Day simply is the First Day of the “Season of Christmas” and it’s followed by eleven other days: the Twelve Days of Christmas!   🙂

So ignore the television celebrities who have been having special 12 day giveaways … ignore the stores who will quickly remove the Christmas displays and put up Valentine’s Day displays.  Ignore it all and enjoy the Twelve Days of Christmas.  Each precious one of them.

The reality is – you’ve got time to enjoy Christmas! 
… you’ve got time to bake cookies and take them to a neighbour or friend who is unwell or on their own.
… you’ve got time to send Christmas cards to family and friends. 
… you’ve got time to decorate because –
Because the Season Christmas lasts until the end of January 5th!

On each of the Twelve Days of Christmas, “Soulistry” will offer a reflection about that day and link it to the well- known Twelve Days of Christmas song in a unique way.  The series begins tomorrow night, Christmas Eve, at https://soulistry.com/blog   Check it out each day or simply subscribe (it’s free).

May the Season of Christmas … all Twelve Days … extend the Spirit of Christmas beyond Christmas Day. 
May the Spirit of Christmas dwell deep within.
May the Spirit of Christmas bring peace, joy, love, and hope to our pandemic-riddled world.

And by the way, if you wanted to send someone Christmas greetings (a card, a visit, a phone call, an email) do it!  You’ve got lots of time.  🙂

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As always, you are invited to comment here and always welcome to share.


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© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
@soulistryjune.bsky.social

Winter Solstice – an Invincible Summer Within

Winter Solstice – an Invincible Summer Within

Dawn broke through these trees in my back yard a number of years ago.   And now, in the midst of a world where chaos and hatred and fear seem so prevalent, we need dawn to break through again.  Perhaps it is time to remember *all* of Albert Camus’ text in his often-quoted “invincible summer” words?

“In the midst of hate, I discovered within me an invincible love.
In the midst of tears, I discovered within me an invincible smile.
 In the midst of chaos, I discovered an invincible calm.
I realized through it all that, in the midst of winter, there was an invincible summer.
For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me there is something stronger –
something better, pushing right back.”

<Albert Camus>

The very word ‘winter’ can bring far more to mind than simply the weather.

The present chaos, hatred and fear seem so prevalent.  Many hearts have become cold.  “Something better, pushing right back.”   Yes!

In the midst of hatred, tears, chaos, may we ‘push right back’ so that an ‘invincible summer’ can emerge in the hearts and minds of us all.   May the Winter Solstice’s light of hope and healing break through!

© June Maffin

Blog


www.facebook.com/junemaffin
@soulistryjune.bsky.social

Winter Solstice, Longest Night

Winter Solstice, Longest Night

Winter Solstice is December 21st: a time in this part of the world when the North Pole is tilted farthest away from the Sun, bringing the fewest hours of sunlight of the year, colder temperatures, snow, dangerous icy roads, power outages, warning of bomb cyclones, torrential rains, powerful winds and darkness.  Many find winter in this part of the world with its darkness, to be depressing, find the cold to be unbearable, and the ongoing respiratory bugs of the time of the year to be a concern.

Winter is experienced in more ways than the weather: ongoing concern about people in various parts of the world take over thoughts of hope as news of bombings, attacks, power outages, political threat; fear, hatred and chaos flood social media.   Personal tragedies, illnesses and grief can contribute to the ‘Winter of the Soul’ experience.   When that happens, the words of Albert Camus can be a reminder of the invincible part of our being: invincible love, invincible smile, invincible calm, invincible summer … and a reminder that Winter Solstice is not only the beginning of longer days – but of hope.

“In the midst of hate,
I discovered within me an invincible love.
In the midst of tears,
I discovered within me an invincible smile.
In the midst of chaos,
I discovered an invincible calm.
I realized through it all that,
in the midst of winter,
there was an invincible summer.
For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me,
within me there is something stronger
something better,
pushing right back.”   

Today, December 21st, the shortest day and longest night of the year, marks a shift: darkness slowly begins to recede – light begins to expand.  Days begin to get longer, albeit slowly, but they begin this day.   

May those who experience a bleak ‘Winter of the Soul’, discover the Winter Solstice’s light of hope and healing of an “invincible summer.”  May their spirit resonate with the words of author Margaret Atwood “This is the solstice, the still point of the sun, its cusp and midnight, the year’s threshold and unlocking, where the past lets go and becomes the future; the place of caught breath, the door of a vanished house left ajar” and encourage a break-through of the Winter of the Soul, giving time and space to look-within, nurturing connection to Spirit.

May we all have a joyful Solstice celebrating the return of the light.

© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
@soulistryjune.bsky.social
WHEN CHRISTMAS HURTS.   BLUE CHRISTMAS

WHEN CHRISTMAS HURTS. BLUE CHRISTMAS

imgresMy dear friends,

Tomorrow,  December 21st, is the longest night of the year.  It’s Winter Solstice, in the final week of Advent, just days before Christmas.  This is the time of the year when many are expecting to feel joy, be that because of their celebration of a religious festival or winter holiday, or simply connecting with family and friends.

But when people hurt, it’s difficult to feel joy.  Many aren’t able to tap into any sense of hope or peace either,  because of personal loss of a loved one, problems with finances, employment, housing, health, fear about the future.

Around this time each year, many churches and communities offer “Blue Christmas” services to try and offset the stress that is being felt by busyness, cacophony and expectations of the holiday season.

But, going out in the evening, when it is dark or the roads are  impassable because of inclement weather or one is unwell, or when the thought of being with others feels even more draining that the festivities at the time of the year seem to bring, makes attendance at such services difficult.

And so, a thought came to me – create a When Christmas Hurts/Blue Christmas ritual for individuals who are sad/blue.  If you are someone for whom peace, hope, joy are elusive at this time of the year, it is my prayer that following along with this liturgy will bring you comfort.

Before you begin, I encourage you to find some candles and a match.   You might find a particular coloured candle or a variety of candle colours is helpful.  Any four candles can help.  I love the colour of royal blue and it “fits” with the Blue Christmas theme and royal blue is the colour of the Season of Advent (the four weeks before Christmas Day) for many.

As each candle is lit (hopefully in a darkened or semi-darkened room to get the effect of the light emanating from the candle), you may want to have some quiet music playing in the background or simply be in silence.  Choose a time and place when tv, children, family, friends, loud music, electronic devices will not be a distraction.

Speak out loud or think / pray each phrase slowly, reflectively. There is no need to hurry. This is your time. Take the time to “be” in the moment.

To begin … take a few slow, deep breaths from your abdomen, inhaling a welcome of peace to yourself and exhaling that which brings anxiety. When you find your breathing has slowed down … begin.

LIGHT FIRST CANDLE AND SAY / THINK / PRAY SLOWLY AND QUIETLY

I light this candle to remember those persons who have been loved and lost this past year and in years long ago.

I pause to remember their name(s) … their face(s) … their voice(s).
(Give yourself time to do this.)

I give thanks for the memory that binds them to me at this difficult time.
(Give yourself time to do this) 

May Eternal Love surround them.

            [Silent time for reflection]

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LIGHT SECOND CANDLE AND SAY, THINK, PRAY SLOWLY AND QUIETLY

I  light this second candle to redeem the pain of loss:
… the loss of relationships
… the loss of employment
… the loss of health
… the loss of hope
… the loss of  Christmas
… the loss of  …
(whatever you are experiencing as ‘loss’ at this time)

(Give yourself time to think of those which apply to you.)

As I  gather up the pain of the past, I offer it, asking that the gift of peace, shalom, wholeness be placed into my heart, my head, my spirit.

(Give yourself time to do this)  

May I be refreshed, restored and renewed.

              [Silent time for reflection]

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LIGHT THIRD CANDLE AND SAY, THINK, PRAY SLOWLY AND QUIETLY

I light this third candle to remember myself.

I pause and remember the past weeks, months (years)
… the down times
… the poignancy of memories
… the grief
… the sadness
… the hurts
… the fear
… the pain of reflecting on my own mortality
… past Christmases

(Give yourself time to do this.)

May I remember that dawn defeats darkness.

May  I remember the words written on a wall at Dachau prison —
“I believe in the sun even when it’s not shining;
I believe in the stars even when I see them not;
I believe in God even when I don’t see God.”
(or – I believe in Love even when I don’t feel Love.”)

      [Silent time of reflection]

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LIGHT FOURTH CANDLE AND SAY, THINK, PRAY SLOWLY AND QUIETLY

I light this fourth candle to remember the gift of hope.

I lean on the Holy One who shares my life … promises a place and time of no more pain and suffering … and who loves unconditionally

(Give yourself time to do this
… or substitute any phrasing that will be meaningful for you).


May I not forget the One who shows the way and goes with me into my tomorrows.

 [Silent time of reflection]

 Amen.  So be it.  Amen.  (“Amen” means “So be it.”)

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The “Blue Christmas” individual ritual/liturgy has now come to a close.

You may want to consider spending time in the darkness … looking at the lit candles … listening to quiet music … soaking in a hot bath … sipping a hot cup of tea or hot chocolate.

May you be assured that there are people who care and people who pray for ‘those who think that no one cares for them’.

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© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
https://soulistry.com
www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
Photographer: Laura Hope (used by permission: Unsplash)

ADVENT 4: Love

ADVENT 4: Love

Is the story true?  Did it really happen?   

I like to believe that in every legend, every parable, every story, there is a tidbit of ‘something’ that can bring good news.   The legend of the Poinsettia plant might be such a story – if it is true.   But even if it is not true, it is a good story.  It’s a story about love.  And a story about love is perfect for the Fourth Sunday in the Season of Advent with its theme of love.

The story so impressed Joel Roberts Poinsett (first U.S. Ambassador to Mexico and botany-lover), that he brought the bright red star-shaped flower to the United States from Mexico.  And that is how, it is said, that the Poinsettia plant got its name.  But what was the story – the legend?

Little Maria and her brother Pablo were very poor.  They  barely had enough to eat two meals a day.   Each year, their village church in Mexico created a large Manger scene and everyone wanted to go and offer a gift to the Baby Jesus.

Even though the children had no money and couldn’t buy a gift, they wanted to see the baby and bring him a present.  Maria thought they could bring some weeds growing along the roadside to make the bed softer for the baby and decorate the baby’s crib.  But when they arrived with the weeds, other children teased and mocked them for bringing such a lowly gift.  Maria and Pablo began to cry.

Suddenly, the weeds were transformed into bright red petals that looked like stars!  Everyone was in awe.  It soon became clear that what the sister and brother had brought the Christ Child was far dearer than the most expensive present that could be bought.  They had brought the gift of Love.    Precious.     Valuable beyond any other gift.

But then again, the Gift of Love always is valuable and important.  If you’re still uncertain about the importance of love, how about this wee story about Pooh, Piglet and Eeyore … 

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One day, Pooh and Piglet realized that they hadn’t heard from Eeyore for several days, so they put on their hats and coats and trotted across the Hundred Acre Wood to Eeyore’s stick house.  Inside the house was Eeyore.  “Hello Eeyore,” said Pooh.  “Hello Pooh. Hello Piglet,” said Eeyore, in a glum sounding voice.   “We just thought we’d check in on you because we hadn’t heard from you, and so we wanted to know if you were okay” said Piglet.  Eeyore was silent for a moment. “Am I okay?  Well, I don’t know, to be honest. Are any of us really okay? That’s what I ask myself.  All I can tell you, Pooh and Piglet, is that right now I feel really rather Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All, which is why I haven’t bothered you, because you wouldn’t want to waste your time hanging out with someone who is Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All, would you now.”

Pooh looked and Piglet, and Piglet looked at Pooh, and they both sat down, one on either side of Eeyore in his stick house.  Eeyore looked at them in surprise. “What are you doing?”   

“We’re sitting here with you,” said Pooh, “because we are your friends. True friends don’t care if someone is feeling Sad, or Alone, or Not Much Fun To Be Around At All.   True friends are there for you anyway. And so here we are.”   

“Oh. Oh”  said Eeyore.  And the three of them sat there in silence.  While Pooh and Piglet said nothing at all, somehow, almost imperceptibly, Eeyore started to feel a very tiny bit better.  Because Pooh and Piglet were There.    No more.  No less.

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Life can be difficult.  These days, it can seem to be almost impossible.   Many are feeling just like Eeyore: ‘Sad and Alone and Not Much Fun to Be Around At All.’   

We may not be together with family, friends in person because of geographical distance, illness, finances, politics, but we can be together – and share love (I love the phrase “Never let your theology get in the way of love” which is 
widely attributed online to John Spencer), in other ways.   
… we can pick up the phone and call someone we know
… we can write someone an old-fashioned letter
… we can send a text, an email, a handmade card, a decorated envelope.

And if we can’t do any of that, let’s ‘think’ of others:
… think of people we know and consider part of our family
… think of people we appreciate, but don’t know – shopkeepers, educators, health care professionals, recycling/garbage workers, municipal workers, restaurant employees, artisans and crafters, service people, postal workers, first responders, housecleaners, volunteers, politicians, lawyers, bus/truck drivers, religious leaders, computer technicians … and the list goes on.
…  think of people we don’t know personally, yet know about in our communities and this world we share: the homeless, unemployed, addicted, dispossessed, abused; those who are dying, grieving, depressed, sad, lonely, frightened; those at war; those dealing with mental, physical, spiritual illness.   

As we ‘think’ of them, let’s “think love.”   Let’s send thoughts of love’s healing to their body, mind and spirit. 
Some call that ‘prayer’. 
Some call it ‘energy’.   
By whatever name, it can be powerful!  

May this be a blessed, very special Fourth Sunday of Advent in ways we cannot even begin to ask or imagine.

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© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
www.facebook.com/groups/soulistry
soulistryjune@bsky.social

MAKE TIME TO MOURN.  MAKE TIME TO GRIEVE

MAKE TIME TO MOURN. MAKE TIME TO GRIEVE


Grief is such a powerful emotion. Being able to participate in a funeral, a Celebration of Life, a Memorial service for someone who has died, can be a helpful ritual. But what about when such events aren’t happening, or Mother Nature interferes and travel is inadvisable, or the gathering/service isn’t being recorded, or it’s only happening for immediate family, or …?

Grief can become an unwelcome visitor deep inside our soul at any time – when death happens – when loss of any kind is experienced.

Today begins Hanukkah for those observing the Jewish faith. Christians are about to observe Christmas. Others have marked Solstice, Kwaanza, Diwali and at those times, as well as times of birthdays/anniversaries, grief can feel unsurmountable when others seem to be so happy.

What then? While churches and funeral homes offer services like ‘Blue Christmas’, they may not be helpful to everyone.

Perhaps a personal ritual – done at home – quietly – alone or with a few others – might be of help. If so, I invite you to print out this little ritual I created and has been shared countless times over the years. “Make Time to Mourn. Make Time to Grieve” is a gentle way to grieve … it’s important to remember that there is no one ‘right’ way to grieve. Grieving takes time. Grief surfaces at ‘expected’ times. Grief surfaces at ‘unexpected’ times. Grief surges and wanes. Grief can seem overwhelming. And at this time of the year, when many expect to feel happy and joyful, but cannot because they are experiencing loss of … a loved one … job … family pet … relationship … home … finances … limb … health … hope, grief can seem overwhelming.

“Make Time to Mourn – Make Time to Grieve©” was created to be used when the experience of loss is present … holiday time … or at any moment throughout the year … when loss of any kind is experienced.

It is shared below, with love. All are welcome to use this little liturgy and as always, you are welcome to share.

May healing, grace, hope and peace surround and infill you.

June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog
@soulistryjune.bsky.social

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“MAKE TIME TO MOURN. MAKE TIME TO GRIEVE”
© June Maffin

Before you begin, I encourage you to find some matches and candles. As each candle is lit (hopefully in a darkened or semi-darkened room to get the effect of the light emanating from the candle), you may want to have some quiet music playing in the background. Or, you might want to do the ritual in silence. Try not to have the tv, loud music on, or do this at a time when children/family/friends/pets could make demands on you.

If you want some symbolism, choose your candles accordingly. I prefer to use royal blue (the colour of hope), but you may find that white (the colour of wholeness), red (the colour of Spirit), green (the colour of new life) offers deeper significance for you. Use whatever coloured candles you like or have on hand. Speak / think / pray each phrase slowly, reflectively. There is no need to hurry. This is your time.


To begin … take a few slow, deep breaths from your abdomen, inhaling a sense of peace and exhaling that which brings anxiety. When you find your breathing has slowed down, light the first candle.

LIGHT FIRST CANDLE AND SAY/THINK/PRAY …
I light this candle to remember those who have been loved and lost.
I pause to remember them … their face, their voice, their name.
GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO REMEMBER THEM.

THEN SAY/THINK/PRAY
I give thanks for the memory and circumstance that binds them to me.
May Eternal Love surround them.
[Silent time for reflection and simply “be-ing”]

LIGHT THE SECOND CANDLE AND SAY/THINK/PRAY
I light this second candle to redeem the pain of loss:
the loss of relationship, the loss of job, the loss of health, the loss of finances.
GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO THINK OF WHATEVER YOU ARE EXPERIENCING AS ‘LOSS’ THIS DAY.

THEN SAY/THINK/PRAY:
As I gather up the pain of the past,
I offer it, asking that into my open hands the gift of peace, of shalom, of wholeness be placed.
GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO DO THIS

THEN SAY/THINK/PRAY:
May I be refreshed, restored and renewed
[Silent time for reflection and simply “be-ing.”]

LIGHT THE THIRD CANDLE AND SAY/THINK/PRAY…
I light this third candle to remember myself.
I pause and remember the past weeks, months (years):
… the down times
… the poignancy of memories
… the grief
… the sadness
… the hurt
… the anger
… the numbness
… the shock
… the pain of reflecting on my own mortality
… the fear
GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO DO THIS

THEN SAY/THINK/PRAY:
May I remember that dawn defeats darkness.
May I remember the words written on a wall at Dachau prison — “I believe in the sun even when it’s not shining. I believe in the stars even when I see them not. I believe in God even when I don’t see God.” (OR FOR A FINAL SENTENCE: “I believe in hope even when I don’t feel it.”
[Silent time of reflection and simply “be-ing.”]

LIGHT THE FOURTH CANDLE AND SAY/THINK/PRAY …
I light this fourth candle to remember the gift of hope.
I lean on the Holy One who shares my life,
and who promises a place and time of no more pain and suffering
and who loves unconditionally.
GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO DO THIS OR SUBSTITUTE ANY PHRASING THAT WILL BE MEANINGFUL FOR YOU.

THEN SAY/THINK/PRAY:
May I not forget the One who shows the way and Who goes with me into my tomorrows
(or substitute any phrasing of gratitude that will be meaningful for you)
[Silent time of reflection and simply “be-ing.”]

CLOSE BY SAYING/THINKING/PRAYING
Amen. So be it. Amen. (“Amen” means is “So be it.”)

[Silent time of reflection and simply “be-ing” in the darkness]


When you’re ready, transition back to your regular activities by doing something for yourself if you’re able: a long leisurely bath; a hot cup of tea/hot chocolate; listen to some gentle music … and know that there are people who care and that even though you may feel alone, you are not completely alone.

An aside: revisiting the “Make Time to Mourn. Make Time to Grieve” ritual (whenever experiencing loss) can bring healing and hope and adapting this Gaelic blessing (using ‘me’ instead of ‘you’) can be a gentle way to re-connect to the peace experienced as you moved through the “Make Time to Mourn. Make Time to Grieve” ritual. Not just a one-time opportunity for helping to move through grief/loss because we experience various kinds of loss throughout our lives so print it out, file it, share it, use it. May it bless you in your moments of grief.

Deep peace of the running wave to you (me).
Deep peace of the flowing air to you (me).
Deep peace of the quiet earth to you (me).
Deep peace of the shining stars to you (me).
Deep peace of the infinite peace to you (me).

© June Maffin
https://soulistry.com/blog

@soulistryjune.bsky.social
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https://soulistry.com/make-time-to-mourn-make-time-to-grieve